Middle of my high school is the most exciting part of my teenage years. The person I’ve become dates back to those years, I guess. I was always arguing with people. I loved to act like stupid because I wanted to show them the other side of general people. There were basic topics for me which I could easily understand but didn’t prefer to do it. In general, those were about cultural walls that people don’t think about but obey.
In 3rd year of high school, I was
not a believer anymore. The society I was living in was generally included Muslim
people. They were not Muslims for me, maybe just followers of Anatolian cultural
costumed religion thing. For thousand years religions appeared in this region
and people followed the rules. I wanted to break them so hard that I didn’t
care about anything else.
That year was also the year when government announced
that women can wear hijab at school. I was angry to this decision because it
was just about Muslims, and they were using this to get more votes… We (men)
were not allowed to have long hair, wear earrings or piercings but for everything
were allowed. This situation triggered my anger more and more.
One day when I was waiting for the lesson to
start, one of our head teachers came and told me to take out my bandanna from my
head. I was not surprised but it was my time for to shine. I started argument
with this sentence “My religion tells me to wear this, if hijab is allowed for Muslim
girls I want the same privilege.” At the end I won, felt so relaxed and proud
of myself. Following days there were more arguments like this with teachers and
I was beating them one by one…
After some months it was time for the best Erasmus+
project in the school. I was this time hundred percentage sure I will go to
other countries. I was joining the online meetings, making presentations about
global warming. I was so happy till I learned I won’t be able to join any of
them. This time I learned the truth. As I mentioned earlier, I reported some
students to Ministry of Education. Because od this there were many problems occurred
in the school, they started to investigate our school and our teachers had some
trouble times… Our school manager was offended and stopped talking to me
because of this but I didn’t know anything.
I went to him and tried to talk with him, but he
was not even looking to my face! Then I made my move with religion argument
again. (This one is my favourite) I told him that a “Muslim cannot stop
speaking with another muslim more than 3 days! You’ve been not talking to me
for months which I didn’t recognize…” He turned his face to me and started to
apologize (funny). He promised me about the projects that I will go to Italy and
Poland.
After I solved this problem, I turned back home happy and start waiting the day. One week later I had another hard argument with a teacher who was the wife of assistant director. She asked us to bring quiz book with us. I brought quiz papers and she refused and said I want book not papers -This woman also didn’t give me 0.5-point earlier term, so I had some troubles with the lesson after. And her husband was always disturbing me in the lessons like making jokes on me-. I started to read book instead of solving my paper quiz.
After some time she said
why don’t u solve your quiz, I was so happy that she asked this question. I
told her that I don’t have any quiz if I had u wouldn’t refuse. She started
screaming and said meet me at the manager’s office after the lesson. I went to
the office after the lesson, and I was so happy. She started to write something
on the paper at the room while acting like she was innocent with tears in her
eyes. I was laughing all the time and tried to cut her speech, but manager didn’t
let me to do it. He said wait for your turn. I was fully sure she couldn’t do
anything to me!
I waited for an hour for her speech to finish
and started to talk. After 2 sentences manager stopped me and said we will meet
you at board of discipline. I was shocked but expected this to happen and I stood
up and said “I would love to talk there instead of talking in front of people who
doesn’t do their job as professionals. You are just bored and searching for fun
which I would love to be a part of. See you there!” I closed the door so hard
that anyone could hear the sound in the school.
I don’t know if it’s about this situation, but
they again didn’t let me to join the projects again. I got so angry and talked with
the teachers I am good with. I told them everything and they said that this
school doesn’t deserve those projects because of the manager and his
assistances. They promised that they’re not going to do another project there ever
again. I was depressed after those problems and started to smoke and drink alcohol,
I didn’t feel well. I was feeling like I will never have a chance to go to
another country again till I found another opportunity to go United Kingdom in
4th year of high school…
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